Cajun Witch

Ah, back to a bit of Magick! First off, I did what I said I would and took the weekend to get back to me.  I meditated.  I lit candles.  I set intentions.  It all felt so good!  I am still working and progressing towards accepting what may be my new normal with my face, but it's a work in progress. Now, with two storms on my doorstep, I did a candle to help protect.  Dressing the candle and setting my intentions felt SOOOOOO nice.  Watching its burn and feeling as though I'm doing something right felt wonderful.  I won't go into detail about my intentions or the spell itself, for protective reasons.  But I used both herbs and oils that I looked up that are good for protection and for storm safety.  Since Marco doesn't seem to be much of a threat anymore, I'll do my offering for Nature tomorrow most likely to ask for protection from Laura.   I still have my Reiki practice on hold.  I know one of the first "rules" is you can...

Well, it seems I have my diagnosis.  The doctor is confident it's Trigeminal neuralgia and neuropathy.     Those may not be spelled correctly.   It gets better--all of my tests were normal, which is a good thing.  However, it also means that there is no real reason as to why this started.   It gets even better--the doctor, although trying to stay positive for her patient, didn't give much hope.  She more or less said things may fade but they'll come back.  She also said that the numbness will prolly not go away. I don't think I've processed it all just yet.  I do know I was overly angry yesterday at the world.  I hated that.  I put out way too much negativity into the universe.   I go from anger to depression to nothing in moments.  And in between is pain and my brain not thinking.  I keep telling myself to just be normal.  But all of this stuff is neurological--it's brain stuff.  How can...

  I'm so very over this.   My newest symptom:  I feel as though the left side of my face is in a bucket of  ice water.   I know in my head it isn't cold.  I touch the area and it isn't cold.  But this FEELING of cold is making me MISERABLE!  I can't even think well enough to get sentences out.   Don't worry, I did message the doctor: "Please continue taking notes and we'll discuss at your appointment on Thursday." What the actual hell?   So I guess this is my life now.  Every few weeks I'll get a new fun surprise symptom of this thing going on in my face that we don't know the cause of.   And, as MUCH as I want to read and practice, I can't.  I can barely focus enough to type out my thoughts right now.  Meditation doesn't happen.  Reading tires my eye too quickly.  And a coworker/friend said my new meds make me look high at work--lovely! I think I want to crawl in a (very warm) hole ...

  I know I'm  the worst at keeping up with my posting.  I apologize for that.  I have so much going on health wise that it's hard to make the time for blogging unfortunately.   Let me explain... For about a month and a half (maybe two--time doesn't keep with me) I've been dealing with having half of my face numb... Picture this--you drink a tube of Orajel on 1/2 your mouth.  Then, the numbness spreads to the rest of your head.  Oh, and once in a while, you stick your finger in an electric socket, just to keep the nerves alive. That's been my life.  I had an MRA (like an MRI but different somehow) and an ultrasound of my thyroid yesterday.  I also started a new medicine that's supposed to help with the whole electrical socket feeling.  I'm so over the whole thing.  I have still been studying and practicing.  I turn to conversations in front of my altar a lot.  I hope that doesn't make me crazy...er than usual. ...